There was a time when simply going to work required courage.
For months, I had to walk into an environment where I felt undermined, rejected and emotionally exhausted. Yet every morning, I reminded myself to hold my chin up. I smiled through the pain, continued doing my work and trusted that the answers would eventually come.
Holding my head up did not mean that I was unaffected. It did not mean that everything was fine. It meant that I refused to allow what was happening around me to determine who I would become.
Today, in 2026, when people attempt to undermine or sabotage me, I respond differently. I smile—not because their behaviour is acceptable, but because I have already survived the kind of experiences that were meant to break me.
I am hardened now, but not bitter.
Instead of seeing rejection as the end, I see it as information. It may be a sign that there is something bigger and better elsewhere. It may mean that the environment, opportunity or relationship is simply not for me.
Sometimes rejection is not punishment. It is redirection.
When the Attack Comes From Other Women
We often speak about women supporting women, but we must also be honest: sometimes the person trying to keep a woman down is another woman.
A confident, talented or determined woman can make an insecure person feel threatened. Instead of dealing with that insecurity, the person may resort to gossip, exclusion, manipulation or sabotage.
They may question your qualifications, minimise your contribution, withhold information or try to turn others against you. Sometimes they will smile in your face while quietly working against you.
That experience can be especially painful when you expected understanding and support.
However, another person’s insecurity is not proof that you are doing something wrong.
You do not have to become smaller to make someone else feel comfortable. You do not have to hide your abilities, apologise for your confidence or abandon your purpose because your presence challenges someone.
Your responsibility is not to manage another person’s insecurity. Your responsibility is to remain grounded in who you are.
Keep Your Chin Up Without Pretending
“Chin up” does not mean pretending that something did not hurt.
You can acknowledge the betrayal. You can admit that the rejection disappointed you. You can recognise that the situation was unfair. You can even step away, rest and give yourself time to recover.
Strength does not require denial.
Real strength is being able to say, “This hurt me, but it will not define me.”
Holding your chin up means refusing to surrender your identity to the people who misunderstood, mistreated or underestimated you.
It means continuing to believe in yourself when other people try to make you question your value.
Do Not Let Pain Change Your Character
When someone treats us badly, the temptation is to return the same energy. We want to expose them, embarrass them or prove that we can hurt them too.
But revenge gives the person even more influence over your life.
Protect yourself. Establish boundaries. Document what is happening when necessary. Speak up when the situation requires it. Walk away when remaining would cause further harm.
But do not allow another person’s behaviour to turn you into someone you no longer recognise.
Their actions reveal their character. Your response reveals yours.
You can be firm without becoming cruel. You can defend yourself without becoming destructive. You can leave without losing your dignity.
Confidence Does Not Need Permission
Confidence is not believing that you are better than everyone else. It is knowing that you do not have to compete for permission to be yourself.
People may misunderstand your confidence because they have become comfortable with your silence. They may call you difficult when you establish boundaries. They may say that you have changed when you stop accepting disrespect.
Let them talk.
Growth will change the way you respond. Healing will change what you tolerate. Experience will teach you when to speak, when to remain silent and when to walk away completely.
You do not need everyone to agree with your decisions. You need the courage to make decisions that protect your peace, purpose and future.
Grow Through What You Go Through
The painting Chin Up was created over another artwork. That process became part of its meaning.
Something new emerged from what was already there.
The previous painting was not wasted. It became part of the foundation. Its colours, texture and history still exist beneath the new image, even though the surface has been transformed.
Life often works the same way.
Your painful experiences do not have to be erased for you to become something new. They can become part of your foundation. The disappointment can teach you discernment. The rejection can develop courage. The betrayal can teach you the importance of boundaries.
You are not starting from nothing. You are building from experience.
The goal is not simply to go through pain. The goal is to grow through it.
Rejection Can Reveal a New Direction
Some doors close because remaining in that place would prevent you from discovering what else is possible.
At the moment of rejection, we often focus on what we lost. We ask why we were not chosen, appreciated, promoted or supported.
Later, however, we may realise that the closed door forced us to move.
It pushed us to develop an idea, start a business, create something new, discover another opportunity or finally recognise our own strength.
Do not spend your life begging to remain in a place where your value is constantly questioned.
If you have done your best and the environment continues to diminish you, it may be time to consider whether you have outgrown it.
There may be more waiting for you beyond what you are trying so desperately to hold on to.
You Are Becoming Unstoppable
Being unstoppable does not mean that nothing will ever hurt you again.
It means that pain no longer has the authority to end your journey.
You may pause, but you will not surrender. You may cry, but you will rise. You may have to change direction, but you will continue moving.
What tried to destroy your confidence can become the experience that strengthens it.
So when people underestimate you, keep your chin up.
When someone tries to sabotage what you are building, keep your chin up.
When rejection makes you question your future, keep your chin up.
Your present situation is not the final picture. You are still growing, changing and becoming.
Sometimes the very thing that was intended to bury you becomes the foundation upon which you build your next masterpiece.
Keep your head up. Protect your peace. Trust the redirection.
Grow through your pain, embrace the change and become unstoppable.
Watch the original video: Chin Up: How to Rise Above Sabotage, Rejection and Pain
By Shawn Ashman — Lady Ash
Artist, entrepreneur and motivational speaker
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